On the top of the Mountain

Tonight’s post is a somber one, so you are forewarned.  Today I buried my best friend.  There’s a hole inside me that seems so incredibley huge, I feel as though I lost a portion of my body.  We had a beautiful day and a touching  ceremony.  Everyone was absolutely wonderful, kind and supportive.   Our family, friends and God circled around us and gave us strength.  I’m feel so blessed to have such a support system that I know most people don’t have.  It’s been such a comfort to know if I need anything, there’s always someone willing to give me a hand.  It was especially important today, as I said good-bye to the man of my heart.  I felt my heart break to pieces as my children said good-bye to their father with tears rolling down their little cheeks.   I’ve asked God so many times in the past few weeks, to let me take on some of their pain so it won’t hurt them so much-as I’m sure both of my parents have felt about me.  I’d do anything to make this better for them.  My peace comes in the fact that I know Chris is with God, and not feeling all the pain any more.  As we drove into the cementy today, Jaxson said “Oh, this is nice.  Daddy’s going to be on the top of a mountain!” (The plot is on the top of a large hill.)  Yes, Chris is on the top of the mountain, and he’s climbed a long way to get there. He made it to the top, and now he is getting his reward with God.  We will all miss him and love him so much.

I will still be posting, as I’ve had many requests to do so.  I feel this part of the journey is still a part to share.  I’m not the writer Chris was, but I will try to do my best.  Somewhere in my heart, I seem to hear him telling me to keep this going, especially for the people who are in the same place I am now.  Thank you to everyone for praying for Chris and his family today.  And I’d like to thank everyone for coming today or yesterday.  It was great to see so many people who Chris loved so much.  I’m sorry I wasn’t able to talk to all of you, I was trying, but Chris was loved by so many it was impossible to get to everyone.  I wish you all a peaceful night.

Love,

Karen

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17 Comments

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17 responses to “On the top of the Mountain

  1. Heather Tidd

    Karen,
    Thinking of you and the boys. Prayers…

  2. Miriam Ring

    Karen,
    Thank you for sharing this personal part of your journey – I’m sure it can’t be easy! Just know that people showed up yesterday and today because they love YOU and the boys, too, not just Chris. You have been on my heart and mind during Chis’s journey, and I know that is the case for a lot of the Proex gang. You are a strong woman, and I pray that God will bless you and keep you as your journey without Chris continues. Know that you and your boys are loved!!!

    Love and peace,
    Miriam

  3. Karen … Thank you for sharing this with us as we wish we could have been there.

    We wish YOU peace!

  4. Beth and Barb

    The service was so wonderful & the presence of Christ was so evident. We are and will be praying for you that God would grant you his peace that he had given yo today . We did love Chris & we do love you .Love Barb & Beth !

  5. Suzy Welch

    Karen

    I was a very nice service. Chris did a good job. When I got to the cemetary I thought the same as Jaxson, but I also think the view is very pretty. Thank you for sharing Chris with everyone during the last few weeks with everyone. God bless you and your family you will continue to be in our prayers.

    S. Welch

  6. PAT

    Karen,Brenden & Jaxson,
    We held Chris in our arms as he headed towards the top of the mountain! I was so blessed to have been able to do that! And I will for ever now hold Chris in my heart & soul. Chris is now safely with His Lord in heaven I know that seeing everyone yesterday he was carried to heaven with extreme love! We know Chris is safe & surrounded by beauty & love! Karen, althrough many of us did not want to interfere with your last journey with Chris we were there for you surrrounding you & the boys with more love than you know! We will not t ry to fill the enmorous hole in each of your hearts, We hope only to try to fill your lives with love & friendship! As Chris was on this journey to heaven we all got a chance to meet an incredible family that was filled with love & courage & strength that inspired us all! I hope you will know in yor heart that yesterday was a day we could show you & the boys how much you will alwasy be a part of our lives always!! WE ARE HERE WAITING FOR A CALL TO BE A LOVING SUPPORTIVE FRIEND.

  7. Dan

    Karen, Thank You for sharing and also for continuing Chris’s Blog. Chris really does deserve to be High On A Mountain. In the past wo years and even more in the past few mounths, Chris’s Blog has help me put things in my life in prospective, I am truley thankful for that. With Chris in Heaven he will continue to be there in spirt, on your and the boys journey. Chris will alos continue to speak to you through you heart. He may have left us on this earth but he has not and will not leve our hearts.
    Thank You agins.
    You and the boys are in my prayers.
    Love Dan.

  8. Nancy wolf

    How beautifully written from the heart. God Bless you and your family.

  9. Bethany Lempola

    Hi Karen,
    Your words break my heart- as I can not imagine how hard it is to be a mother on top of losing your other half. You are doing such an amazing job. I have shared The Baty Blog with several people- and all have had the same response: “What an incredible family”. We feel blessed to know you! Our thoughts and prayers will continue to be with you daily-even hourly. Carter told me that Chris was probably tired today from all of the bowling he did last night -as we have told him that thunder is just angels bowling 🙂 Carter has also been asking to have a playdate with Brenden and Jaxson- not sure what you are doing this week- but if the boys want to go to Edinborough on Wednesday or Thursday with us- I would love to take them. Give me a call if they feel up to it- hugs to you all.

  10. Shellie Gebhard

    Karen,
    I think you write beautifully and I’m amazed by your strength and ability to share with us. I can’t imagine all of the feelings you are going through. The service was very nice and Chris’s choice of music was wonderful. You and the boys are in my thoughts~
    Shellie

  11. Missy Schwake

    Karen, thank you so much for continuing on with the blog. It has touched so many lives, mine included, and we would all feel so lost if we were not able to share in the continuing journey of you and the boys! When you’re writing comes from the heart, as it did here, it is beautiful poetry. Do not stop! The service for Chris was hard but so, so good. Chris did a good job in planning it. My heart and prayers are with you, as always, one mom to another.
    Missy

  12. Kent and Joy

    Karen, Our hearts go out to you and the boys. You will continue to be in our thoughts and prayers. Kent and Joy

  13. Vickie Van Kempen-Grieme

    Oh Karen your post was writtten beautifully. I wish you nothing but healing in your heart and strength to forge forward in the coming days, weeks and even months. Your love and kindness with the boys will help them to overcome such obsticles as these. There is nothing like the touch of a mothers hand to help in healing their wounds. Be strong my friend and know that you are loved by many. Hugs, Vickie

  14. Kristine (Murphy) Ihrke

    I think you are doing a wonderful job with your posts. Please post as often as your heart needs to. It really helps to share your thoughts and so many want to help you through this. Though many of us can’t fathom or don’t even want to imagine what it feels like, there are so many that want to be there for you. So sorry I was unable to attend, but I thought of you often. So glad Terri could make it as she has thought of you so often over the years and considers you a dear friend. May you find peace and comfort over time.

  15. Melanie Ristow

    Hi Karen,
    I am continuing to keep you and your boys in my prayers. I can not even imagine the difficult task of two little boys saying goodbye to their daddy that loved them so very much. You are doing a great job on the blog here. You will have the words when the words are right. You are an inspiration to many and by you continuing on this journey, it will hopefully be a healing place for you as well. You will have so many ups and downs as the waves of grief hit you like an overwhelming oceanic wave, through it all God will be holding you when those waves seem taller than the sky, God will be holding your hand, more importantly he is holding your heart as well as your 2 beautiful little boys.
    With much Sympathy and love to you and the boys!,
    Melanie

  16. Marja Wiinanen

    I am sorry that I couldn’t be there for the service. My Dad said that it was lovely. I thought of something that helped me and maybe it will help you or the boys one day. After my Mom passed a way a dear friend that had had a brother pass away at a young age gave me a journal. She had been given one after the death of her brother and it helped her and me. It was nice to be able to feel like I was able to still tell my mother what was going on. I still will write in it occasionally. I know coming up too will be the big adjustment after all the family and guests are gone and things have settled down. I will be thinking and praying for you and your family.

  17. Krisann Bissener

    Hi Karen, I just learned today that Chris has passed. I’m so sorry about the pain you must be feeling. I know it all too well. I lost my husband Glen in June of 2009. Although you and I never met, Glen and I met your husband Chris at one of the Colon Cancer support groups when he was first diagnosed. I have often thought of your family and if there is ever anything I can do, please let me know. I’m glad that you have a great support system and keeping busy is important to getting through this very difficult time. Wishing peace to you and your family. Krisann Bissener

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