And yes, we are still on the bowling theme…

So as some of you don’t know, my children don’t read the blog very often.  Sometimes Chris or I would/will ask them about a post or get their thoughts on something we are working on, but for the most part, it’s not something they look at very often.  But Brenden did read the last post on the bowling.  He read it and gave me the Brenden Baty “what’s this all about?”  look.  I asked him what the look was for and he replied “thunder is caused by the heating and cooling of air from lightning.”  I said “that may be true in science, but I like to think Dad’s up bowling with his Grandma Baty.”  He thought about it for a little while, as Brenden does, and then replied, “then the lightning must be the spark from the friction caused by the bowling pins hitting each other.”  “Excellent idea!”, I said.  If we are going with the bowling theme, we might as well go all the way with it.  So as the last storm hit, Brenden would say something like “That must have been a strike!”  if it was a loud thunderclap with lots of lightning.  It’s fun when he can take an idea and run with it. 

On another note, we are doing o.k.  The boys and I went to my parents lake place this past week since they were on spring break-or I should say “winter’s back” break.(It snowed about 10 inches there.)  My parents place is kind of a safe haven for us right now as Chris has not spent a lot of time there in the past couple of years.  I would take them there when he had chemo so Chris could get some rest, peace and quiet.  When he did make the trip, he usually did a lot of sleeping.   The kids don’t have a lot of memories of Chris there, so they got a little more of a grieving break for a few days.  We definitely have had our moments.   Sometimes when the garage door opens, I think, “Oh, Chris is home.”  Only to remember that he’s gone.  The kids seems to have the most dificultly at bedtime, which I find interesting because that’s always been “snuggle time” with mom.  I think it’s just a time in the day they’re not so busy and they have time to think about things.  We’ve all had bad dreams, and our crying jags.  I’m wondering how long it will be before I attempt to wear makeup again.   My mom is still staying with us, which is such a wonderful thing.  Sometimes it’s hard just to get out of bed, let alone take care of the kids and the house.  My brain doesn’t seem to be functioning at full capacity.  It’s hard to concentrate a lot of the time.  I feel like a zombie for part of the day.  I also don’t have a lot af patience(not that I had much to start with.)  I hope that changes soon.

I’d like to thank everyone for their continued support the past week.  My children and I appreciate that from all of you.  I’d also like to thank our families who keep taking care of us through this time.  I’m not sure what we would do without you all!

Peace to all!




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9 responses to “And yes, we are still on the bowling theme…

  1. Gina Meixner

    Hi Karen. I have been thinking of you all week and wondering how you are doing. I can’t imagine how strange it must be to have a weekend free from dealing with cancer and funeral arrangements only to have time for the reality and emptiness you all must be feeling. Please know you, the boys and your families continue to be my my daily prayers. (I will add ‘patience’ to the list for you, I’m sure we could all use alot more of that!)
    Jeanne from Pictura and I are planning on coming over for a Legos & ice cream night with you and the boys as soon as you are ready. Jeanne and I met at Pray for the Cure over a year ago when we went to meet Chris. Ours is one of many relationships I am sure Chris had a hand in.
    Thank you for sharing with us and continuing the blog.
    Looking forward to seeing you soon.
    Love and Blessings!

  2. Suzy Welch

    I’m glad you have a place you can go to and feel some peace. I’ve been thinking about you and the boys all week. I will continue to pray for healing.

    Suzy W

  3. Dan

    Just thinking of you and the boys. I keep up on the blog daily. It is great to see another post. I will be in Atlanta this week but please call me if you can. I wish I could tell when things will change but I can not. I don’t know if anyone can. Just remember we are all here for you and the boys when you need us. So please call me if you can and give the boys and your mom a big hug from me. Also a even bigger hug form me for yourself.

  4. Vicki Starbeck

    God Morning!!! Since your post about the “closet” bowler that Chris was, I smile every time I hear thunder. I also smile every time I think about Chris. He was such an inspiration to everyone he knew. I know how much he loved you and “the Guys”. He smiled every time he talked about his family. When my dad died, I wrote a poem. The last sentence is one I keep in my heart: BECAUSE OF MEMORIES WE’RE NOT SAD, ONLY LONESOME FOR OUR DAD! I miss my dad very much, but I know that he’s watching over me until my time for heaven comes. And I’m not sad for him, I just miss him very much.
    I’m looking forward to watching the guys play soccer and baseball this spring. You’ll have to post their game schedule on the blog so I can come watch.
    Keep looking up! Blessings!!!!

  5. Melanie Ristow

    Hi Karen,
    Thank you for posting on the blog. I like to hear how you and the boys are doing. I’m glad for you and them that you were able to escape for a while.
    The grieving process is a strange and long process, it is continuous waves of emotion and reality.
    ((((HUGS)))) from me to you and your precious boys.

  6. Vickie Van Kempen-Grieme

    Girl you have got to give yourself a break. Healing is so differant for everyone, try not to be to hard on yourself. Going through the steps of grief are all part of healing process. Just know that when you look into the eyes of your boys, they to are grieving the only way they know how. Your love for them is unconditional and you will all heal in time.

  7. PAT

    KAREN & BOYS, Our arms still surround you with prayers,love & feelings of helplessness that you & your boys loss can not be healed in ways that we here on earth can heal or fix!! We can only reach out with helping hands & loving hearts & say we are here. Karen,Brenden & Jaxson we are still alll out here when you feel like reaching out!!

  8. Nancy wolf

    That Brenden what a smart kid. Glad to see your post. So nice you have a place to go. Time lots of time and things get easier. It just takes time.
    Those boys of yours will keep you on your toes. They will be a good distraction.
    I think of you often. You are an amazing person.
    Your strength amazes me.
    Keep on, keepin’ on
    Thoughts and prayers


    Karen, You & the boys never have to feel bad for how you feel. All those that know& love you all understand. So you all should feel free to feel what you feel when you feel it. I love the idea that lighting is the pins falling over, that is awesome. Sending love your way, keeping you al lin our hearts & prayers.
    love cheri

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